But self, though it would intrude, could not engross her. Lydia―the humiliation,the misery she was bringing on them all, soon swallowed up every private care;and covering her face with her handkerchief,Elizabeth was soon lost to everything else;and, after a pause of several minutes,was only recalled to a sense of her situation by the voice of her companion,who,in a manner which, though it spoke compassion,spoke likewise restraint,said,
“When my eyes were opened to his real character―Oh!had I known what I ought,what I dared to do!But I knew not―I was afraid of doing too much.Wretched,wretched mistake!”
“I am afraid you have been long desiring my absence,nor have I anything to plead in excuse of my stay,but real,though unavailing concern.Would to Heaven that anything could be either said or done on my part that might offer consolation to such distress! But I will not torment you with vain wishes, which may seem purposely to ask for your thanks.This unfortunate affair will, I fear, prevent my sister's having the pleasure of seeing you at Pemberley to-day.”
As he quitted the room,Elizabeth felt how improbable it was that they should ever see each other again on such terms of cordiality as had marked their several meetings in Derbyshire;and as she threw a retrospective glance over the whole of their acquaintance, so full of contradictions and varieties, sighed at the perverseness of those feelings which would now have promoted its continuance,and would formerly have rejoiced in its termination.